Who gives a rat's ass?

Tonight's NCAA final is a steaming pile of dog crap -- Ohio St. vs. Florida? God, let's hope that something -- anything -- forces both squads to forfeit. Florida's best player wears a fucking ponytail. OSU has a fucking nut as a mascot -- a NUT! At least we get a lash of hoops hottie Sam Ryan during the broadcast. She's a little bit of alright, int she? More important, perhaps: if you do a Google Images search for "Sam Ryan CBS," you get some pretty fucking awesome results. So awesome, in fact, that I'll explore that shit instead of watching this stupid basketball game. Fact.